Two Faced People?? WHY?

We all know someone (co-worker,parents,friend,family member,lover) who is labeled as "two faced" in Societies views someone who is two faced is someone who speaks behind someone's back while not in their presence but when in their presence makes it seem as if they are the world to them. It's someone who goes behind their friends' back and says mean things or random things about them. Turns around and flips the story to make it seem like it was not really said, THAT WAY.

My opinion is that most people, who are two faced are lacking self esteem. They cannot share a friend. They do not want their TWO friends to have a Friendship. So if they can turn these two against eachother, they do not have to fear being left out if their friendship, kicks off. People who are labeled as two facer's are usually good people, but people who have suffered some form of emotional trauma causing them to really fear losing someone/something.
The fear of being replaced, sometimes it/can be extremely overwhelming for someone who has lost all their lives.

Then there's those who barely, have any friends at all and then they are somewhere and hear someone talking about you... in order to try to make conversation and fit in, will often say something innacurate about you. simply to be involved in the conversation and feel that he/she is part of something.
Am i making excuses for these people? NO! Because I've been victim of it many times and it's a horrible place to be. I am not making excuses but it is the truth. Not everyone does things to hurt others on purpose or make trouble for fun. Some people really have NO IDEA what they are doing, while doing it. it comes naturally because of Internal Emotional Scars.

so before you end up cutting off a friendship because of these things. Have a talk with your friend. Find out WHAT IS REALLY GOING ON. Chances are there's something deeper than you can see or imagine... not all people are out there trying to hurt you for the sake of hurting

People who DONT want the help

I have encountered all kinds of people from different ethnic backgrounds, ages, sexual orientations in this line of work. But it's in my own personal life that i became baffled a short time ago. When  I encounter a client, we discuss the situation. We discuss the options. We find a solution and we begin working on a better tomorrow. Not this time. This is a (friend of mine and i use the term losely) I've known this person for quite some time. This person has had a very rough life.  Family abandonments. Drugs. You name it this person has been through it.  This person has a good heart, COULD be intelligent but chooses to be reduced to ignorance.  Does not want to learn about NOTHING. If a show on television is turned on where you can learn something, she will change the channel She says "this is why i didnt like school i don't like to learn, i can't stand that  crap" Person is always talking about she's judged and no one likes her nor trusts her.

I gave this girl a chance, I took her into my life. Helped her get on her feet. cleaned her up, off the drugs quite a bit.  Then we started talking about things that happened and why she has been so angry at the world lashing out and just saying things to hurt people around her. She said.  I need help, I know i need psychological help. FINE! So, I bring it up.. I said "If you really want the psychological help, I'll arrange for you to be able to see a Psychologist. I will even pay for it, if you need me too"  She takes a long pause.... She looks up, at me and she says.....

"I know I need the help, but I don't fucking want it... fuck it.. fuck it... fuck it...."

You can Imagine the look on my face? I was feeling a lot of emotions but confusion was the one taking over, I asked her.  Why wouldn't you want the help, when you know You need it? She tells me, she does not mind the pity that she gets and that she's born to be a fuck up, so the hell with it?
I closed the chapter right there, some people might be like omg! you really should have kept helping this person. she just really needs help, shes afraid, she's this and she's that. NO.

What this person is, is SELFISH.   We all know some people like that.  They will take, abuse and use you as much as they can with the show of "im changing and i want help" but as soon as help is on the way they turn things around and just love being miserable and using their past as a crutch. Nothing will ever change. 
Sometimes, no matter how much we love the person (family member, lover, friend) We have to cut them out of our lives before they bring us, down with them

Useless argument or Lesson in the making?

There's times in life where things happen that are completely out of our control. It's easy when we have a falling out with our best-friend or our significant other, parents. To blame them right off the bat. It's THEIR fault. I didn't do anything. okay, that's when you take a deep breath and you say. okay, I didn't do anything TODAY. Maybe the argument stems from something that has been done by you in the past. As friends and Lovers we often let things slide, but after enough is enough we tend to want to just OKAY. Your going to have to learn this the hard way and give someone a taste of their behavior.
It happens to the best of us, We always find it so much easier to blame someone else, than to actually consider that we're part of the problem, not the solution. What we have to learn is to become part of the solution. Work towards not pointing the finger so fast. Besides, we all learn from every situation in our lives. These are lessons to help us progress on our paths. If we don't learn, we don't progress.  Which means more than likely we're going to go through the same thing. over and over again until we learn the lesson which we are suppose to. So next time someone is angry with you, not speaking to you or just has words for you. Try not blaming them right away, try seeing what really happened to lead to this point.

I am not saying to be the subject of abuse because it's something you must of did. I'm talking about random little fights. not physical or psychologically abusive arguments/fights. I'm talking about those arguments you keep having over and over with the people in your life



The photo I am using to the left this morning is property of www.abstractdigitalartgallery.com/